Monday, September 14, 2009

Disappointment

I just don't understand how it can happen. How can a person be one way most of the years of their life then suddenly do a 90 degree change. Their beliefs in what is right and wrong, their faith, the people they associate with...all changed...and not for the better! I realize that I tend to go through life with blinders on, refusing to see the bad in people, but when it is blatantly shoved in my face how am I supposed to react!? The only word that I can associate with any of it is disappointment. There are other words like, disillusionment, displeasure, distress, frustration, regret, failure, defeat and on it goes. I'm not saying the person is a failure but that I must have failed them in some way. Does it mean I don't care, absolutely not! Maybe I care too much!
I just can't let my life be driven or defined by what this one person is doing with their life. I can't turn my back on them but I can distance myself and in doing so it is quite literally breaking my heart.
If this person reads this post and understands who I'm speaking of, take heart, you're still loved but the chasm that separates us is getting wider and deeper and I'm at a loss as to what to do about it.